Wandering Thoughts

I have memories of my parents believing not to start long travel journeys on the 2^nd, 8^th, 14^th, 20^th and 26^th of every Bhutanese calendar month. The vivid memory I have is on 2^nd date of the month. It was considered to be bad day for travelling. The day is said to be “TA-SHI-GA-CHA”

I grew up with this belief and always avoided travelling on that particular day. My parents had stories to narrate that on TA-SHI-GA-CHA a revered lam wanted to travel far but his followers protested him not to. Without agreeing to his followers he started his journey, the only possession the lam had was one earthen pot which also broke on that day. “Za chi cha na za nyi jung, di ya lamai kadrin en” meaning a single pot when broken becomes two and that is also the blessing of my master. For that matter my parents said that “lam dro me wong” which means your journey won’t be pleasant.

Recently I had an urgent reason to travel to Thimphu. I asked one of our local businessmen who was at Tashigang to book one bus ticket for me on 16^th (3^rd date of Bhutanese month). He said all the tickets for that date were booked and the tickets available were on 15^th (2^nd date) or 17^th (4^th date). If I took the latter date I was going to get late so with no option left I asked him to book the ticket for 15^th.

Later in the evening he handed me my ticket and the seat number I got was No.3! After all this years of travel in public transport this is the first time I have got seat in the front seats. I was hesitant but started the journey anyway. The numbers of passenger in that 32 seat capacity bus were just eight travelers including the driver. We reached Bumthang safely on that day. Thank you gracious! I breathed a sigh of relief for that TA-SHI-GA-CHA day was over.

The next day journey continued with shower of drizzle we crossed Yotongla. Few kilometers down the lane the road was blocked with large falling boulders. “Dho chim zum chi”: “Boulder like house” Is it the post TA-SHI-GA-CHA effect? Two excavators came to our rescue while we had to wait around ten hours. Ten hours into travel and waiting my stomach started with its loudest growl! May be same was the case with my travelling mates. A stranger was kind enough to share his gayza sips (beaten maize) which were supposed to be taken as gift to his relatives in Thimphu while I also started unpacking my gayza sip (beaten maize) and sharing with traveler mattes. The sympathy in Bhutanese!

As my neck turned to and fro from our bus there were at least 60 vehicles stuck on that block. Did they start their journey on TA-SHI-GA-CHA just as we did or was it the monsoon that was doing the trick to my hesitant mind?  My lame translation of TA-SHI-GA-CHA is TA-SHI: horse dies (horses were used for travel in olden days) and GA-CHA: saddle breaks.

I cannot advice you not to travel on TA-SHI-GA-CHA but I can assure you that we Bhutanese do believe in this day. TA-SHI-GA-CHA is not a good day to start long journey for Bhutanese. I take the blocked road as broken saddle taking bus as the horse.

The two days journey is extended to three days journey!!!

P.S I seek forgiveness from my readers if my lame translation comes no close to its original meaning.

We feel their absence and we long for their presence but do we even take slightest effort to let them know that they are being missed and we are waiting for them? I am one of those individuals who feel but won’t show often. I was reading “Passu Diary” wherein he has penned down every moment and the message clearly reached to the person intended. You might feel it today and your message may never reach unless you let them know at the earliest. We never know if tomorrow or the next life will visit us first. I best express my thoughts in writing than verbal. Let that lump in your heart burst out in your words. So I decided to write for her. To the friend whose month’s absence I feel. This is to you NIM DEM.

I remember the first time we put up job applications for this particular job the interview times and later the selected times. Unsure of if we were to take this job but we decided we take it and take it TOGETHER. So here we are in this journey. It has been one year and three months since we took this decision. We chose to come in the same Dzongkhag. The distances between our stations are almost 132 kilometers away but we at least met once or twice in a month. For an official purpose we get our private time too. But this month feels too long. I know how busy you are with the Desuup training and now how I wish we should have attended the training together! I should not have left earlier than you or I should have asked you to come with me.

This month feels little longer and tiring too. The days become longest when I visit Dzongkhag. The people I meet on my way ask me about my partner. I miss our days when we get twinned with dresses without discussion, our walking days, talking days, eating days and our together time. I wish your training gets over soon. I feel your absence and I miss you my friend. Come soon and here I will be waiting for you patiently. Complete you training soon and let us volunteer together.

Candle light dinner and it sounds romantic, doesn’t it? Did you just imagine your better half sitting face to face with you? Few candles lit in between two of you while you stare at one another with burning love and passion. Waiting for the dinner you ordered to reach to the table. Or do you have wine of your taste and flavor you are enjoying at the moment? Did you just create this romantic scene with my lines? Ah…ha… I have to drag you back to reality. This wasn’t the candle light dinner I am talking about.
The power went off since 9: AM today. I don’t know where did the power went off too though (smiles). My mobile battery has started giving me red signal and only 24% of battery is left in my laptop. It was already 7:30 PM and the dawn started getting darker. I started with my dinner preparation and then in a while I was done cooking my dinner feast. I live with a neighbor who is a door step away from my home. I and his family decided to eat together. By the time we got together to eat together it was already dusk. Time to light the candle!
In that candle dim lightened room I noticed that today there were pressure cookers instead of electric rice cookers and hot water in a pot than in a boiler. Today I noticed the dark! Tonight’s dark is taking me back to my childhood memories. I have wake memories of growing in home lit with candles and kerosene lamps and my parents waking at the first call of roosters. The memories have become more unclear with almost decades of rural electrification. I have almost forgotten the dark. In that instance I start worrying about my mobile and laptop battery percentage. Then this idea of writing popped into my head. Ohh… I am already done with dinner and back to room.
I started scribbling in my book with three candles lit. Wheew…. The power is back. Now I understand what it meant when my mom told me “In a click of mouse you see the world, in a flip of button you hear voices and on a single snap of switch the night turns to day” The day of the night is back!
Candle light dinners are only romantic if the person you are having dinner is your other half and IF YOUR MOBILE BATTERY does not show red signal!
The electricity generated though our fast flowing rivers has brightened our lives, extended our working time, and brought day into night. The responsibility of taking care of this source falls upon us. Environmentalism and Responsibility. A day without power is a day more in darkness.

Narang is a small community with area of 49.91sqkm and household of 227 out of which 15 households are Gungtongs and a census population of 2274. More than half of the population are out of Narang few settled in urban areas and others either studying or working in other places. I live in this small community!

Bhutan is known all over the world for its pristine nature and carbon negative principles. But the question now is, how long can we hold this image upright? To whom does the responsibility fall on to? Do our parents living in a small community like the community I live in even have a slightest idea of what it means to conserve and protect our environment?

Once I asked a crowd of this community a question “Where do you get chips covers, plastics and pet bottles from?” The answer came in union “From the shop” to their answer I replied “In this community, you get the above mentioned from the footpath we walk, on the ground we play, near the tree we rest, near the water source we drink and finally in the shops.” There are just three shops here.

The sight of red, blue, white, orange and grey on the lush green ground does not bother our crowd yet. At least not in this small community. They see it as colors and do not know that it will take thousands of years for these plastics to degrade. These sights have been disturbing my sight for quite some time. Then I started this individual project of picking up plastics on the footpath I walk – home to office.

This individual project seemed to work somehow. At the very least the road that I walked got cleaned up every day. On the way to and fro to my office and my home. I could literally feel the joy of my individual project. A month later I have another few friends who pick up the garbage and place in the dust bins. My friends picking up garbage may not have been the ripple effect of my individual project, but I am glad that we are doing this in group now. At least we pick up little garbage to wherever we visit.

With this small initiative of picking up plastics from our environment to the right place, we want to educate our small community through examples than orders. May be if we continue with our small initiative one day may be the people of this small community will be bothered by the different colors on the lush green environment.

The responsibility finally falls upon us those who are bothered by these unhealthy sights!

P.S. With the help of local government, the health sector of Narang gewog has now taken initiative to construct dust bins to all the households of Narang.

Can you really think of what did you do in one year when we tend to forget of what we did in a moment ago? I was talking with one of my friends who have got through Bhutan Civil Service Examination (BCSE) and is pursuing his postgraduate in Royal Institute of Management (RIM), Thimphu. We were talking of our whereabouts and howabouts of our everyday life and career life. Then he started asking me on what I will do after my contract term is over. By the way, I forgot to mention that I am working as a contract employee.

I was like I am not sure where will I go or stay. Right at that moment and right in front of my contract end period laid a blank page! Basically, I was Blank! He started suggesting me to join the civil service and give my second try for BCSE. He was lightheartedly guessing the questions that would be asked during the viva. One question hit me deep; he asked me “What was your greatest achievement in two years?”

I had no instant answer to his probable question but I went to flashback mode on reflecting what I did in my one year service term for several days and even now. There are 365 days in a year! What did I actually achieve? How would I have answered if this question was asked?

Should I answer to the physical developments which reached after I got into the service? But it was all preplanned and all I did was help in carrying out and monitoring. Should I answer that I went to office on time and left the office on time? Should I answer that I attended meetings and workshops? Or should I answer that I served in one of the remotest areas? But there are hundreds of civil servants who are serving places more remote than I am serving in.

More than the physical achievements, in one year term I have been able to interact with the parents of our agronomic society. I now know that you do not get apple from fruit market but it comes from the apple tree that our agronomic parents have sweated for. I know that you can be literate and still uneducated and vice versa. I know that people can be selfish at times but you need to be persistent in your good thoughts and actions. I know you will meet groups who will cooperate with you and others who will not.  I have learnt that our children who are cared less are taken care by our great leader. I know how I would feel if I am left alone and aloof in my aged days. I know a simple kind gesture is all it requires to make someone’s day. And that your small kind good deed can inspire few but even if you can’t you have done your part. That volunteerism comes from the heart.

My answer for that probable question would be I have developed myself. I have seen changes in myself and I can relate myself to the small community I have served for. What more would you need to achieve if you have already seen positive changes in you? Doesn’t outer world start from where you stand as an individual?

Can you reflect upon what have you done in a year or past few months?

How many friends do you have? If I am asked that question I will have to count the same person three times or more and increase the number. The number of friends I have is very limited. I like being surrounded by few genuine than thousand questionable ones. I am basically saying my circle is small, compact and I am Sincere in my friendship towards them.

Essays and poems about friends were homework tasks assigned during primary school days. My essay would begin with “My best friend is.….” And I don’t remember what more description I scribbled down. Yes we have been friends since my primary school days to present day.

I completed my lower secondary school then the middle secondary school and even High School. The homework tasks were no more about who is your friend and all. It was about evolution, history and geography, human metabolism, calculus, theories and information technology. The circle of my friends still remained small and compact. I questioned myself on if I lacked in friend making but I loved that close and compact circle.

Then I got into college and after one year into my college entrance my father got arrested and was detained. My semester was not over and I could not make visit. During his out days he used to introduce me his friends but to my utter amazement none of his so called friends made visit to him. May be I never got to listen to the stories of his friends. I started wondering if my dad was worse than me in making friends?

Through the observations I made about my dad’s friends I started doubting friendship. On if friends were real? Or if friends are only for good times? The story took turn when I met my college friends. They have been with me on my laughing days, then the crying days and on my normal days. I don’t have to mention them but I know they truly know who they are.

For making me gain trust in friendship now I have learnt to believe in friendship. I have limited circle of friends but I know they are genuine in their thoughts and actions. May be when my dad comes back I will have to let him meet my friends and teach him how to make friends.

To all the genuine friends around the world. Keep the light of friendship burning and passing so that someone like me and my dad might start believing all over once again.

Lately, this picture has hit me constantly on how I would be at the age of 75. I am 24 now and I have to live another 51 years to be 75. I have always told my friends that 65 would be my perfect age to leave this world. But do we even have choice of when to be born and when to exit? The perfect age of 65 was my certainty until I met this 75 year old woman and now I am uncertain of the perfect age of exit.

To the extreme east a place which is connected by 18KM of rough road from Mongar-Tashigang high way is a Gewog named Narang under Mongar Dzongkhag. It is 100 kilometers away from the Dzongkhag. To the extreme North-West of the remote Gewog is the far flung Village named Yangzor. It is 45 minutes walk for 24 year old woman and 2 hours walk for 75 year old woman.

Yangzor just have three households. Basic necessity like drinking water and electricity is provided except the farm road connection. The first household I visit was a home of woman in her mid forties. She stays alone at home. All of her children (4 of them) stay at Thimphu. Then the next household was the household of energetic home of 75 years old woman and 72 years old man.

They are the lone couple there. At first I felt pity that these two old couple is left alone and aloof in this far flung village. As I entered their house I see a handloom and thought that there is a daughter who stays with them. To my amazement it was this 75 years old woman who was weaving. Can you believe this? She is 75 and is still weaving! Later I found that she weaves and sells her product. The cash earned from the product is utilized in hiring laborers to do their field work.

She has her children in urban areas. She is happy on receiving calls from her daughters and sons on reminding her to take her medicines on time. Household chores like cooking, cleaning and washing are seen as no burden for this 75 years old woman. This 75 years old granny is still in her 50s.

Since that day it hit me deep that 75 years is too short if you are willing to live. There is no certain age to exit this world, just uncertainties to living and existing.

I still question to myself “How old would I be if I were to live upto 75 years?”

It is 4:59 in the morning. I have set my alarm at 5:05 AM. My cell phone beeps with a ringtone and I see the name “JIME LHADEN” on the screen. Yes! The caller on the other side of the cell was my friend. “Sonam, are you coming yet?” Oh… I wished it rained today. I said I did not get out of the bed yet but I will reach in a minute or two. I seriously wished that it rained this morning but to my disappointment the sky is clearer than any other days. There were two choices right at that 4:59 AM moment. I had the choice of going back to sleep and the choice of waking up. I chose the latter one. I jumped out of the bed, put on my snickers and in 4 minutes I was with my friends out there jogging. I know I was late by 2 minutes than the time said earlier but my friends were waiting. Yes they were waiting with a ball! A game of 3 versus 2 was fun and enjoyable. We danced and sang on our way back. What a great way to start a day! After one and half an hour I was glad that my friend woke me and that the sky was clearer and that I chose to wake up.

I am back to home after a great start of day. I took a quick shower, did with my everyday offerings and treated myself to a delicious breakfast. Then I look into my bedroom and then into my cupboard. I see the clothes that I washed day before lying unfolded and the lump of clothes that seriously need ironing . I prefer washing buckets of clothes than folding a cloth. Those clothes that need pressing have been lying there for quite some time. Ahhh…. I sighed. The choice was leaving my room untidy with those clothes all over my room or otherwise. I chose the latter one. It really looks nice to have arranged the things in the place where it should be.

Few weeks earlier a senior mentioned about blogging. Since then I was thinking of writing something. Every time I had topic in a mind and then postponed to pen down things until today. I had the choice of writing or not penning down. This time I chose the earlier one. So here it is! I chose to wake up, chose to put the things in its right place and finally chose to write.

Every moment has choices offered to us, the choice is always yours. I now realize what this quote “You are the creator of your own Destiny” means. THE CHOICE IS OURS!

This is a blog born of passion. Not to generalize but to share the views from my own lens.